About Frustration

So earlier today (and might I add its been a long day here on the west coast) I blogged about frustration as it pertained to relationship issues with Mistress.

Now, there is a new kind of frustration…

Thinking, Prorgressing, Growing

While I hope this blog can be an archive of great an kinky exploits that Mistress and I share in–its also become part sounding board for me, which I find pretty cathartic. Probably annoying to many readers-but hey, its my blog, right?

Here is one of those cathartic type blogs–but in this case its part follow up, part break-through and part me just sort of taking stock:

finding bliss in the NYC subway….

so Mistress and i were able to get together for a bit tonight, and spend some much needed time together, and enjoy some mediocre thai food.  but the company was so good that it more than made up for the relatively bad food.

then Misttress and i headed for the the subway–the yellow line in NYC (n, r, q, w). what has become customary is that i wait with Mistress on the platform for Her train, and then i make my way toward my train. it gives us more time together–and to be honest i am pretty sure Mistress will adm it to this as well, it helps Her feel good.

(to digress slightly, the first time Mistress and i went out, i offered to walk Mistress from the subway we were on over to Her line. She told me it was not necessary, and based on some writings, conversations and the way we are now, i think Mistress wishes She would have said yes that night.)

back to this topic though.

Mistress and i have used that time on the the platform waiting for the train for pda (i had to ask too-public display of affection). so as we walked down to the platform tonight, i smiled a little–yes because i knew i would be able to just hug and kiss my Mistress, but also thinking back to the first night of the subway pda…

it goes back to last winter-when Mistress and i met at Ruby Foo’s on manhattan’s upper west side. the stated reason for this meeting was to end our relationship. a bunch of shit had gone down, and we both walked in thinking this was the beginning of the end.

we walked out holding hands, and i turned to Her and asked, “so where are we now?” and She turned to me and said, “i am your Mistress.”

we ended up on the platform of the 1 train-and as we were waiting, Mistress stood against a pillar on the platform-and i was so overwhelmed that i kissed Mistress deeply and passionately. this continued on the 1 train from 77th all the way to 42. a train full of commuters, and the two of us groping and kissing.

now, subways are a fact of life if you live and work in nyc.  and as a daily rider, i see a lot. yet somehow i am reminded of this moment of pure passion each time i am on the subway.

and more importantly, that same passion conitnues today, some 10 months later.

so tonight, walking through the station, heading to the platform-i was happy. i knew this was time for me and Mistress to turn off the world and just be together. somehow, we do this in the middle of the nyc subway.

certainly it makes all the other times standing on platforms, and packed into cars far more enjoyable. and to be honest, there is something about the pda that gives me a rush-its so far out of normal character for me-that its exhilarating, just as Mistress is.

connected, ueber connected and just having fun

so, last night i got a text from my Mistress–and She kind of needed a hug and some company-so we rustled up dinner plans on comparitively short notice (a couple of hours). which given all that is going on around me right now-work and personal is pretty good.  and we did all of that via text message.

now to put in perspective for those who will read this at a later date-last night was also the vice-presidential debate. Without getting too far into it because of what i do for a living, i am directly tied to events surrounding each of the debates as well.  but i think i am good enough at what i do, and connected enough where i can spend quality time with my Mistress and still make sure i am on top of what is going on at the office.

to accomplish this-email on my RIM, text messages and a random old-school phone call (even to my mobile phone).  pretty vanilla stuff so far i know….

so as i am heading home (and missing the debate) i started to follow what was going on via twitter-first on my RIM then on my laptop (gotta love that sprint air card).

then Mistress texts me and tells me She is taking a bath in a nice vanilla bath bomb (i had to ask what this was too). and we started a nice little give and take via text message that if not x-rated certainly got to an r-rating…when i described in as much detail as text messages would allow how i would wash my Mistress in the bath…fingering Her, sucking Her nipples and letting Her sponge cascade across Her body.

yeah–it was kind of a nice distraction from trying to filter the bs commentary on the debate from the actual cool info i was getting via twitter.

the net was–i realized that for work, information and just plain fun–connected is a good thing. its knowing how to use the tools and gather hte information that really helps.

D/s, boy/girl-oh what a tangled web we weave

i think ultimately, its great that even at 40 there are thousands of new experiences out there to sample, try and at least for me try to understand.

the latest–understanding the line when a D/s relationship becomes a boy/girl relationship–and where does the Mistress/sub part meet up with the happy couple part.

its been an interesting week for me–my monday suddenly became empty–so a special One invited me to a great hours long mid-day diversion.  one that i would not normally take.  we dined, walked, talked, held hands–and She sent me on my way back to the office with a great good bye kiss.

now this was a prelude–since tuesday night we had already had plans for a movie, perhaps some dinner–and some time to chat and be comfy.

based on text messages and emails from monday night and tuesday i felt comfortable in knowing that the line had been crossed at least somewhat–what was a D/s relationship, had dipped into boy/girl.

when i met up with Her at the movies, should i expect to kiss Her hand as is Her custom?, give Her a hug and kiss like She left me with monday?,  can i break the Mistress glass and cuddle?

it turns out the answer is yes to all of the above–She is Mistress–and shall be treated as such–but She is also the girl in the boy/girl dynamic…

now all i have to do is understand girls–and that’s worked out so well.