Did I do enough?

This is a quick post, but a question that I am pondering…did I do enough? or did I let Mistress down?  And unfortunately I think the latter.

Mistress was in the hospital this week.  She went in for what was supposed to be three days (72 hours) of tests.  Ended up being a full week.  Nothing bad, in fact I think it netted out as good news for her.

But I am wondering if I did all I could do to be supportive.  I know the answer is yes, but perception and reality are sometimes different.  I had a tough week, and so did Mistress.  But was there more I could have done?

I have to think more.  Right now, I don’t think so…but I have to think more…..

Silence is Golden-or is it?

Things with Mistress are in a pretty good spot right now, maybe I don’t want to jinx it. Things in my personal life are a mess right now, maybe I am too overwhelmed.

Or maybe silence is golden-and I am trying to be rich.

About Frustration

So earlier today (and might I add its been a long day here on the west coast) I blogged about frustration as it pertained to relationship issues with Mistress.

Now, there is a new kind of frustration…

Something to Think About

So as a dust-up between Mistress and I came to an end last week, she posed the question both in her blog and to me on the phone

Why is it we tend to hurt the ones we love most?

I think my boy and I do it and I don’t know why.

Asked and Answered

Sometimes its nice to hear someone else ask the questions–and get the context of the answers.

A Glass Half Full Outlook

So instead of stealing away for a dinner once or twice a week–Mistress and I are now able to steal away for a cup of coffee or lunch every now and then. We still have our weekly night-which we try to makespecial. But the time together is not what it once was.

Obviously this is not super-ideal. Mistress has blogged about this calling it “the trade off.”

Its the Details, Always the Details

Someone in a professional setting who I respect for his business acumen once said to me-the devil’s in the details. And in life too–the devil’s in the details.

Chivalry, chivalrous and devotion

Mistress and I were talking about chivalry and the scene the other night. Yeah, its kind of hard to believe that the two can be mutually exclusive-yet somehow there are times I have seen at events where it appears to be true.

On July 4th, Mistress and I spent the better part of the day and evening together, and just some basic things made me think that chivalry is not quite dead (at least for me) and its not about D/s its about good manners-what I like to call wiping your own ass.

First came some help with her laundry. Mistress does her laundry in a laundromat across the street from her place.  I was there to help haul the clean (and hot) clothes up the stairs.

Then came a quick run to the supermarket.  This was the first time Mistress and I went to the supermarket together.  Essentially, my role here was to carry the haul up the stairs of her second floor walk up-straight muscle job.  I am only to happy to do so.  There are a lot of things that I can’t do-carry a small cart of groceries up two flights of stairs I am only too happy.

Finally, Mistress and I went for a nice dinner out at an out-door cafe near her house. Mistress got a little chilly during the evening, so I made the 9 block walk back to her place to get her a sweatshirt.

You could say its my role to do these things-after all we live a D/s relationship with FLR dynamic.

But that’s not it. Its about manners and being able to wipe my own ass.

I Concur

One of the reasons I eve have this blog going is at the prompting of Mistress–who has her own blog.  Together we catalog in some way, shape or form our lives in NYC in the scene and how we try to sustain and nurture a great FLR/Ds relationship through the murky waters of challenge that all relationships face.

Today-while I spent more than 12 hours driving to south Jersey and back (I spoke at a conference) Mistress posted a blog saying she had reached a point in her life where she was happy–and that in a lot of ways her life was coming together and I was a significant part of that.

(For a lot of reasons, Mistress’ blog is invite only right now, so I won’t link to it. But if you want an invite to read Kink in the city click and follow the directions).

Well, I concur.  Yes, there are still challenges ahead, but I feel like Mistress and I are in a good spot now, and our relationship is really strong and vibrant.

Going through this blog, you’ll see references to challenges we have faced and hurdles we have overcome.  The good news is that we have, and Mistress is the person I love.

I think Mistress getting started on her new career, and having some success early and being able to build on that has helped her greatly put things in order and take some of the “variables” out of her life.

I am so proud to be there with her, and to be a part of her life.

I can only hope Mistress will let me stick around–and be with her for a lifetime ahead.

Appreciation for the Smaller Things

Saturday night’s have become really special for me in the last year or so. Its the time I carve out and devote to Mistress-and by and large we manage to make sure that we make that standing night work for us.

As I have blogged here, some night’s is fet night, other nights we just hang out and watch TV, other nights we’ll go out to dinner or drinks, sometimes we’ll see some friends–the important part to the night for me is that we are together, no watching the time and we just get to be with one another.